stop bitin' while i'm rhyme writin'/ or we'll be like fighting ... mike tyson.
It might not even be good, but it's still RAP
Something for everyone, but not everything for someone
Filling the cracks in the sidewalk of online rap

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

I wonder how long they took to think up their group name ...

The Team's debut album, appropriately titled "World Premiere" was pirated onto the internet today. Do yourself a favor and avoid it at all costs. Yes, the Oakland group may promise Hyphy Juice dreams and Purple wishes, but trust me, you're better off without them.

Instead, listen to Keak Da Sneak rap over a DJ Premier beat.


And Keak tacks himself on a Mac Dre hit!

Feelin' Myself Remix.

Join us next week when Keak Da Sneak fumbles through more zany hip hop situations! He travels through time and gets to choose who dies, Biggie or Tupac! He takes Big Bank Hank's verse on Rappers Delight! He gets to fetch cheesecake for Puff Daddy! He gets to break down the relationship between the president and black people on national television! He is present when the proverbian golden stake is driven into "snap music" ... what's that? ... hip hop isn't taking credit for "snap music"? ... hmm ok. He gets to not read hip hop blogs and avoid independent rap music! Stay tuned, true believers ...

Monday, March 27, 2006

It's ya boy! No, really. It's Ya Boy.

Kevin Federline is asking who wants to go sixteen with him.

I guess the story behind this one is Ya Boy (San Quinn's cousin, I believe) is K-Fed's ghostwriter. Awesome. He's gettin paid. First Ya Boy signed to Black Wall Street (the Game's label) and up and moves to L.A. and now its this.

K-Fed grew up in Fresno and being the nice wigger he is, was probably raised on Fortywater and Short Dog. So he probably has at least some genuine respect for those dudes and the Bay scene, although his delivery and voice aren't anything special--it just sounds like some random white guy on the street rapping. As hip hop fans and as a society, we're probably better off without this. But, alas, here we are.

So Terrell Owens is a Cowboy ...

And one of his first acts as a member of the Jerry Jones squad is make a pseudo-diss song to his old team and post it on his website.

No need to go over to terrellowens.com, however, as I brought it to you. You can hear stupendous lines like "To the hater who said, I wouldn't get my money / I'm laughing in your face, 'Ha ha' that's funny" and "And this will probably be my best season by far / No mo' gettin' my Eagle on / Meet me at the Star" and just stay here. OK, so when I recorded it, it was a little overmodulated, but you can make out what Mr. Owens says before you dump it in the recycle bin. Sorry, I didn't want to be forced to relisten to it and open the gates of hell again.

Sunday, March 26, 2006

Sure, this guy's cool too ...

But look at these awesome promotional photos for Gnarls Barkley, the Cee-lo and Dangermouse project! I mean, they parody popular films! I don't know why I think these are so cool, it's probably because the last time I wore a "Vote for Pedro" shirt I didn't make a bunch of hit records, but instead I did make a swarm of people who looked a lot like Cee-lo kick my ass. I made a poopy too. Damn, I really need to wash that shirt.

The "Clockwork Orange" pic used in the LA Times is in the post below. Now excuse me while I go get a little of the "ol' in-out, in-out" and by that I mean "patronize a Christian hamburger joint."

Saturday, March 25, 2006

Other People' s Property

I'm down with it. Hmm. Got my wisdom teeth removed yesterday, and for meds the doctor put me on sizzurp. So in my zoned out state, we'll see what other people got for you.

Cocaine Blunts and Hip Hop Tapes got a new Project Pat song. Pretty much what you would think.

Benzino and Dave Mays are done for. This time for sure.

Spine Magazine is all over the Gnarls Barkley project. As everyone else should be. Here is a pic of Dangermouse and Cee-Lo rockin the Droog costumes. And a (not so great) story by the LA Times. And a track that's not on that weird-sampler thing going around the Internets (which, by the way, is pretty damn good).

I'm sure you've all heard, but the XXL website got some bloggers on payroll now (including aforementioned Cocaine Blunts dude noz). The funniest is Bol, of course. While he wrecks shit at his own site, he entered XXL with guns blazing, taking subliminal shots at the magazine and taking no prisoners. A thing I've noticed is he appropriates other people's blog-rant post names (from fellow columnists such as Tara Henley, DJ Drama) and riffs on them, countering their pseudo-intellectualism (or pseudo-gangstaism) with real talk breakdowns. I wonder if this bothers anyone, but I hope he keeps it up.

What the hell is a New Booty, anyway? Bubba Sparxxx feat. Big Boi, Killer Mike - Ms. New Booty Remix. It's got a better beat, too.

A new Prince Poetry (from Organized Konfusion) song, with nice production by Large Pro. "I Got a Right to Know."

Oh, speaking of Large Pro and some golden-era producers, the Black Eyed Peas released (or will release) a remix album called "Renegotiations" featuring production by (*gasp*) DJ Premier, Pete Rock, Large Professor, Erick Sermon and Jazzy Jeff. Who knows what the marketing department thinks will happen with this release, but I'm pretty sure it won't appeal to the BEP's new mainstream fans. Or their old fans. Cuz it kinda sucks.

But here's the two "best" ones, Erick Sermon's remix of "Ba Bump" and Large Pro's remix of "Disco Club" for your listening pleasure (or pain).

Thursday, March 23, 2006

There probably should have been some Prince audio in the Prince post ...

Since his new album been leaked. Yeah, but whatever. Nobody cares about that.

So, T.I. is back. Surely, the best cuts off the album have already been around the Internets, such as his single "What You Know," the Just Blaze produced "King Back" and the UGK-featuring "Front Back." Here is what's noteworthy of the rest.

T.I. feat Pharrell, Common (!) - Goodlife

Isn't there a Weezer song by the same name? Why is this beat not up to usual Neptunes standards? What's up with Common? Dude's blowin up proper like.

T.I. feat. P$C, Young Dro - Bankhead

Got a sing songy synthy-piano sample .

T.I. - I'm Talkin' to You

This song is aiight, but doesn't sound up to par after the first three tracks, which are "King Back," "Front Back," and then "What You Know." Needless to say, the album goes downhill from there.

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

They didn't like Queen either. Or King Missile.

My folks were never big Prince fans (who knows though, maybe my mom dressed up as Sheila E one Halloween), therefore I wasn't one myself. But I grew to love me some "Erotic City" and when I heard some of that pansy stuff ("When Doves Cry," "Little Red Corvette," "Raspberry Beret") I used to dig a lot.

Some other favorites are "The Most Beautiful Girl in the World" and "Nothing Compares 2 U."

But man, he's CRAZY. I mean, even the crazy Chappelle Story anecdotes aside. Just peep this story that came out today about how Prince painted on his rented mansion and wrote "3121" on the walls in purple paint. On a house that just so happens to be owned by Utah Jazz forward Carlos Boozer.
According to the lawsuit, Prince/MPG Music violated its eight-month lease by "painting the exterior of the [house] with purple striping, 'prince' symbol, and numbers 3121." Prince's new album, "3121," is scheduled for release tomorrow. Inside the home, among other renovations, a purple monogrammed carpet was installed in the master bedroom and plumbing and piping was added in the downstairs bedroom "for water transfer for beauty salon chairs."


Also... yes. ALSO. I was looking at YouTube (my favorite site, for now) and I came across this amazing story from Kevin Smith (of "Dogma" and "Clerks" fame) about him directing a Prince documentary that went awry. Too bad YouTube took it down. It was like a 30 minute story about how fuckin crazy this guy is, and how he thinks he can do anything he wants in the world. (Damn, this post doesn't really have that umph it did with the YouTube videos, if you want to check it out I think it's on the DVD entitled "An Evening with Kevin Smith") So uh, here is ... Kevin Smith ... on ... Space Ghost.

(This ep also features rap connoisseur and sometimes director Jim Jarmusch)

And also, something from Prince! Lemme see here... Prince ... Prince ... Price, Vincent ... Princess Diana ... hmm ... Prince!

Sort of. Well, at least I can say I've never linked to anything this embarrassing before. Oh wait, I did post about Kidz Bop a while back. Damn.

Here's a cut off that Balance album featuring Casual. Is he trying to pull an MC Hammer and ride this Hyphy wave til it stops? Actually, it's more like he's hiding behind a hyphy rock and periodically comes out to spit a verse on deaf ears.

Oh yeah, E-A-Ski is pretty bad, except for a handful of beats.

Balance feat. Casual - Look

Friday, March 17, 2006

Not much good shit out ...

Yeah there's been no good music lately.

Here's a story about Traxxamillion in the San Jose Merc.

Here is Beautiful Hustle, relaunched. It's got the "Tell Me When to Go" remix with the Game AND Kanye West. I guess it's noteworthy, but still not very good. I heard this shit when I was trying to pick up some Hyphy Juice for a story I was writing. I also heard Clyde Carson's "Hyphy Juice" when I pulled up to the drive-thru liquor store. How appropriate.

I'll post up some good music if and when it comes out. I've been listening to a lot of Simon and Garfunkel lately. No homo.

Friday, March 10, 2006

What's the least imaginitive name for a musical group you can think of?

Da Muzicians - Camera Phone (Mr. Collipark prod.)

I guess this is like "Metros and Chirpers" for the pervert set.

Mike Birbiglia - Hip Hop Animosity

I'm always skeptical about white comedians talking about rap music from their "is this music?" angle or their "this music is crazy!" angle, but Birbiglia seems to know what he's talking about. But to be fair, this music is crazy!

Thursday, March 09, 2006

17 Dummy? 19 Stupid? 54 Retarded?

I saw this on lemon red and I can't decide if it's really lame or not. Though, if you did buy a shirt that said this, you could probably only wear it for another couple months.

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

We've sprung a leak, and there's (Forty)water everywhere ...

So who wants to hear the new E-40 album without all the distracting strippers and celebrities around?

I'm sure everyone.

I'll exercise a tiny bit of responsibility (as usual) and not post up the whole god damned album (because "unauthorized copying is punishable under federal law" or so I hear), but I'll throw up some tracks that are of note. I'm sure by this time tomorrow everyone on the Internet who wants it will have it and by this time next week scrapers from Salinas to Vacaville will be beating this out, so you can go find it if you want on Soulseek, or just sit next to some purple Cadillacs.

E-40 - Yay Area

Rick Rock flips a Digable Planets sample and its nice.

E-40 feat. Bun B, Juelz Santana, Pimp C - White Gurl

Earl and friends rap about yola over a Billy Squire wanna-beat.

Slapper #1
E-40 feat. Too $hort, Budda - Yee

Slapper #2
E-40 feat. The Federation - Go Hard or Go Home

Notes: I don't know if I'm crazy, but the beats that aren't very good are the Lil' Jon ones. But some of the ones that are real nice are Lil' Jon ones too. The T-Pain guest spot is embarrassing and Mike Jones doesn't say his phone number. All in all, an OK album. They don't all "slap" as hard as I thought it would, especially with Lil' Jon, and they all sound "hyphy" (whatever that's supposed to mean) except for two tracks produced by Bosko.

Sunday, March 05, 2006

Oscar Ni-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-ight

The people who wrote "Slob on my knob / like corn on the cob" have won the highest award for an original song in a film. For the second time, a rap song has won the Academy Award for "Best Song." Congratulations, and stay up DJ Paul and Juicy J. I just think that this performance was lacking some "Free Project Pat" t-shirts, though. Too bad he's out now.

"It's Hard Out Here for a Pimp"

Edit 03/06 12:41 a.m.: By the way here is the performance. By tomorrow, everyone will have this posted up, though.

Is this a race or something?

OK, so first there was Busta Rhymes' "Touch It" remix featuring *ahem* Missy Elliot, Mary J Blige, Papoose, DMX, Lloyd Banks and Rah Digga.

And now ... NOW there's this remix of the cringeworthy "I'm in Luv Wit a Stripper" featuring Akon, Twista, Pimp C, Paul Wall, MJG, Too $hort, Spider Loc, U-God, Lauryn Hill, Arata, Eminem, Eminem's daughter Haley, Eminem's wife Kim, Eminem's dog Muttley, Ron Artest, the '85 Chicago Bears, Weird Al, Harrison Ford reading from "Oh, the Places You'll Go," DJ Clue (Clue Clue Clue), the Kidz Bop Kids, 50 Cent, the guy who 50 Cent battled and took his name from, Freaky Tah, Big Pun, Big L, Theodore Unit, Tom Green, Pitbull (in Spanish), Pitbull (in English), that guy from Maroon 5 and the Macho Man Randy Savage.

I just want you to know that I hate you

Although with the sampled Daft Punk and vocoder-heavy T-Pain being popular these days, I can make a vocoder set and break out that Cher song that was so popular in Germany again. Hooray.

What is "potpourri" anyway?

I saw the "3 Freaks" video on Strivin' today. Back when I first heard the song, I was diggin' it but I started to hate once I found out how DJ Shadow had a fat head.

From Shadow's Digest on DJShadow.com
I’ve also stopped worrying if my changing taste in music costs me fans; life’s too short to live in anyone’s box, especially if that box is constraining your shine. Case in point: cats who tried to goal tend “3 Freaks” without knowing anything about Bay music or its history, even as the song was on its way to classic status among those who actually support and create Bay music.
Calm down, man! Calling yourself a classic is not a good look. That aside, the video is still kinda weak, it tries to utilize green screen effects and a 24-esque storyline, but it really comes off looking like something lame like "Ultraviolet" or "Equillibrium."

3 Freaks

It kills me that I can't remember where that banana-shoe-phone scene is from. Also, uh, is that Willie Brown?

Captain Save-a-hoe

I guess now that "Tell Me Where to Go" has fulfilled the Bay's (or KMEL's) daily E-40 quota by 5000%, I suspect we will never hear this song again. But here's the video nonetheless. Forget "3 Freaks." This is a music video. But I heard that Droop-E remix of "Freaks," and it's not bad (or "it slaps" I would say, if I were down). Good thing he didn't mess around with the beat too much.

So I've been sittin' on some music here. I guess the sequel to 3:16 the 9th Edition is coming out soon, and this MURS webrip has been making its way around the Internet. If you haven't heard it yet, well, ta-daah!

MURS and 9th Wonder - Murs Day

MURS and 9th Wonder - L.A.

And here's the third phantom draft pick by my boy, who says it's the best track on the album: MURS and 9th Wonder - Dark Skinned White Girls

Also that white boy from Foreign Legion put out another album. Technically, though, this is his first album, I learned, because his other album (Death, Taxes and Prozack, i think) was never officially released. How curious.

Prozack Turner - I Wanna Go Home (produced by Oh No)

Prozack Turner - Bangathon! feat. Marc Stretch (self produced!)

Prozack Turner - The Ballad of Adrianna Sage (produced by Paul Nice)

Saturday, March 04, 2006

Mac Dre murder investigation furthers ... sort of

From the Associated Press:
LAS VEGAS (AP) … A double slaying last May that led to the arrest of a rap figure in California stemmed from a feud between Midwest and West Coast music industry groups, authorities said Friday.

But police said they didn't know if the arrest late Thursday in San Francisco of Andre "Mac Minister'' Dow, 35, would reveal links to other local cases or signal an end to a spate of violence dating to at least late 2004 in Kansas City, Mo.

Uh, sure. "Feud between Midwest and West Coast music industry groups." I had no idea there was a feud. All I know is, to me, the Midwest is a long way to drive just to kill someone. Maybe that's why I'm not a rapper. I want to know where Tech N9ne is these days. And, uh, that's all the Midwest rappers I know, excluding Chicago. Maybe I'm just disconnected from the streets. Whole story here.

Sorry there's no music in this post. Oh, wait.

Mac Dre - Retro Dance Record

This thing always made me laugh since seeing it on Nation of Thizzlam about the alleged Romper Room gang.


You know you all used to watch the DMC finals back in the day. Remember when that old, senile guy who runs the DMC presented 13 year-old scratch phenom Torontoian A-Trak to the crowd and yelled "A-Train"? No? Was that just me? Well, now A-Trak is all grown up, and he's Kanye West's DJ. If you look closely, you can see him in "Block Party." Anyway, he mixed this GLC mixtape that was going around a few months ago, but it was skippy and I couldn't stand it. But now there's this EP with some choice songs off it.

GLC feat. Kanye West, Paul Wall - Drive Slow (A-Trak Remix)

GLC feat. Three 6 Mafia - Clap Your Hands (do all new Three 6 songs have to sound the same?)

And here's one that was OK from the mixtape. Fun fact: at my elementary school, there was a building we called the GLC, short for the Guided Learning Center. So I can't say his name out loud without smiling.

GLC - Spaceship '06

By the way, I copped the A-Trak mixtape, "Oh No You Didn't" and to be honest, it's sort of weak. If you follow mixtapes at all, it's nothing you haven't heard before. And you can hear him spin some "mash ups" other djs have made

Zoning Title

Before I get any further, I just wanted to say I saw the movie and people should check out Dave Chappelle's "Block Party." It's really good and stuff, so here's another track from the soundtrack. Much love to Michel Gondry. (It also got like a 92% on rottontomatoes)

The Roots - Boom feat. Big Daddy Kane, Kool G Rap (Live)

So the Bo$$ Hog Barbarians are not from Texas or nothin' (and I think there's Houston stuff tagging itself as "Boss Hogg") but the group in question is composed of Celph Titled and J-Zone. Wow, didn't really hear about this one, didja? So while Apathy is out making albums on Babygrande (is it the new Koch?), Celph and Zone break shit down here. From "Every Hog has it's Day."

Bo$$ Hog Barbarians - Hell No, Ho (produced by the Beatminerz)

Bo$$ Hog Barbarians - You Got Mail

Bo$$ Hog Barbariasn - Boss Hoggin'

"You take orders from a bird, like an Indiana Pacer."

Thursday, March 02, 2006

Booty booty booty booty rockin' everywhere

Bubba Sparxxx employed Timbaland again. Whatever happened to Timb? From "The Charm," which isn't as good as that last one with "Deliverance" on it.

Bubba Sparxxx - Hey! (A Little Gratitude)

Another one with Sleepy Brown on the hook and a verse from Petey Pablo.

Bubba Sparxxx - The Otherside feat. Sleepy Brown, Petey Pablo

It's inexplicable why I like Bubba Sparxxx. It's even a little hard to admit. At least the Internet allows me total anonymity! In any case: Bubba Sparxxx > Paul Wall.

Bubba Sparxxx - Wonderful

Block Party!

Before gettin up on this Dave Chappelle "Block Party" soundtrack, I don't think I listened to either of these tracks for the better part of two years. Remember the days when these dudes were going to rule the world? Now Dead Prez is just a footnote and Mos Def is in "16 Blocks." Awesome. Anyway, these tracks got a band backing them (is it the Roots?) and it's pretty dope. "Block Party" comes out this Friday.

Dead Prez - Hip Hop (Live)

Black Star - Definition (Live)